Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.
- President Dwight D. Eisenhower

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Guido McGuido-person.

Look at him. Take a few seconds and try to catalog each of the fashion mistakes that this man has committed. By my count, there are six failures of fashion embodied in this man. We have the designer intentionally bleach speckled shirt. The man paid extra for someone to ruin his shirt. The incredibly obnoxious earring and necklace. He matched those pieces of jewelry on purpose. The beard. Oh, Jesus... the beard. Just look at what he has done to his eyebrows. It's like he's trying to stab me in my soul with the twelve hairs that he left on each brow.

Finally... the hair. This counts as two. First... he had it feathered. Feathered. Secondly, the only way that I know of to make hair stand like that is to slather aerospace adhesive on one's scalp.

He did this to himself on purpose. He's pleased with how he looks. An autistic with a wardrobe from 1998 can tell that it's a bad idea.

He can't.


Kimber said...

I thought it was the skin tone that bothered you the most. Was it from a can, or from a booth?

andrealamorand said...

Awesome blog!
That guy is a f*cking nightmare!
I think his skin tone was straight from the devil himself.
Your lips should be darker than the rest of your face, not LIGHTER!!!

That guy is the epitome of douchebag!

Stepho said...

Yes, I'm surprised you didn't mention the handbag tan! That was the first thing I noticed. Also, his beard looks like he drew it on himself with eyeshadow.

Drunken Chud said...

i like to call his hair "go fast hair". because it's not a true spike it's more of an anime spike in which it is angled backwards and looks like the wind is flying through their hair. when i see people with "go fast hair" i have to yell at them to slow down. seriously.

Krissyface said...

there's a whole bunch of photos like this on the internet...someone sent them to me once. It reminds me of when the Wayans brothers dressed up for that movie "White Chicks". It scares and intrigues me at the same time.

Booya said...

I believe that the site krissyface is referring to is Hot Chicks with Douche Bags (http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com). And is it just me or does that guy look like a failed Treasure Troll abortion?